Who is That Cutie Patootie in the Tutu?

When you are getting married one of the exciting decisions is WHO to include in your bridal party. Your college roommate...his fishing buddy; you try not to offend those closest to you, but rather include everyone in some fashion.  Inevitably, the discussion will come round to the possibility of having a young niece, daughter, or daughter of a friend of the bride and groom stand as flower girl for your processional.  

Some couples choose to exclude children from their wedding altogether, and this is a decision that only you and your spouse-to-be can make. But, if you ARE open to the idea of having a flower girl you are embracing a centuries old and time-honored tradition that extends into many cultures. What, though, is the flower girl's purpose in the wedding? Why does she throw flower petals from a basket? 

The flower girl first made her appearance in Ancient Rome when she would carry wreaths of herbs and wheat down the aisle before the bride emerged.  The herbs and shafts of wheat symbolized prosperity and fertility for the bride and groom.  Back then, the girls wore white gowns that would probably be used for other purposes more than just the wedding. 

During the Medieval days, the flower girl carried garlic down the aisle which was said to ward off evil spirits.  Fast forward to the Victorian era, when flower girls began being dressed in white gowns to resemble the bride. These pristine (well, hopefully!) white gowns were adorned with a festive and colorful bow.  The flower girl of the "modern age" often sprinkles rose petals or carries a pomander or nosegay.  In some cultures, there are many flower girls, rather than just one, as is tradition in the U.S.

The flower girl symbolizes youth and innocence and is a reminder of the beauty, wonder, and joy of youth. This symbol is further suggested by the transition from young girl to stunning bride. This nod toward the rite of passage into womanhood remains a wedding tradition, as many brides include at least one special little girl as a part of the big day. 

Having children in your wedding is a show of love for children, especially the ones chosen to be a part of the wedding, and can symbolize wishes for future children to be had by the happy couple.  At one wedding I officiated at recently, the bride and groom already had a small daughter.  Lily was just shy of two years, and she was led down the aisle in a beautifully decorated wagon by her cousin.  She had a bit of stage fright and did not quite understand what she was supposed to do with the petals in her basket.  Then Grandma whispered to her to remember to sprinkle the flowers.  With eyes wide, she jumped out of the wagon and ran BACK down the aisle strewing flowers petals in big clumps every which way. The guests were delighted by her innocent, yet hilarious, little antics. 

In another ceremony, the processional of bridesmaids glided toward the altar as traditional wedding music played.  Then, as the flower girl stepped onto the runner, all music stopped.  As the flower girl of about 9 years of age made her way down the aisle, there was not a sound.  This was in stark contrast to the bubbly, bouncy flower girls we are used to seeing, but it was beautiful.  All eyes watched as this lovely young girl quietly tossed petals on the path for the bride. As the bride made her entrance, the music swelled again and everyone stood. I later found out that the DJ had not intended to stop the music, it was a glitch in the system and he was trying to fix it as the flower girl did her thing.  What a wonderful, reverent, poignant mistake!   

It is tender moments like these which build the fondest memories for everyone at the wedding, especially for the children you honor as a part of it.